Thank you..

i miss you OD...

This post is strictly dedicated to my best friend Pamela..

(taken last year for my 20th b.day)

I got to build the most amazing friendship with the most amazing person. Sleepovers so smacked your scared you wont remember all the funny shit we heard. All the nights we went from being the only girls, yo being apart off something real. The bbq's, the beach, the parties, 3am train rides home.. everything. For all those times you sat and listened to me talk about her, and for giving me advice much better than anyone could ever give. For being my nigga, no matter what, and picking up the pieces of my horrible days.

For being an amazing best friend. Understanding that we might not be able to wake up next to each other hungover and sick.. but inside of our responsibilities and commitments, we'll always have each other.

Those summer days I didnt even know who I was. Crying over her, or acting so weak I couldn't stand myself. Being able to go to your house to sleep because I needed to be away from everyone else but close to someone who wouldnt ask any questions yet reminded me in your own way that I was stronger and better than that.

The nights I thought I wasnt going to make it with my mind right, you were next to me saying "your going to be okay, this ain't she we got this" Those Saturday nights. 6am cab rides. Shoeless, feet swollen from dancing or walking 30 city blocks all night & the 40's. Even when sleeping till 4pm the next day had turned into leaving to work a few hours after we got home.. we still had out night baby!

You were they're when I fell in love. With me on that random ass boat ride on the FDR and ALL those days in bed. The type of comfort I never thought I'd find in ANYONE. I hand an amazing winter and a hard summer but all in all you were there. For giving me the sickest reality check something I thought I'd never meet anyone capable of doing. Regardless of whatever happened, for that I'm forever thankful.

All those days I dragged my feet around that building I cant stand. Who made getting out of bed in the morning a lot easier because I knew I'd have someone to talk about everything with durning lunch or smoke and L with after class.



For helping me find myself. Helping me find what I want to do, or how I'm going to do it.. I was scared of fucking up. You were there with me for everything. And just for that, I feel like regardless of what the outcome was... I succeeded.

So thank you Pamela for making up for all my bad days. When I had felt like I had lost everyone I never had. Where I was prepared to do things on my own, and developed that mentality where I thought I didnt need anyone you teaching me that people will always love me if I let them. You helped me grow and learn in every way. There with me to experience things I will remember forever... I miss you, those summers.. winters.. days.. nights.. memories it was all fucking amazing.